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Hello and welcome to all manic depressives, web addicts, paranoid lunatics, prospective world dominators, people who thought that this was a porn site, bored school pupils and even more bored school teachers the world over!

You have successfully logged on to www.statto-jtapublishingco.fsnet.co.uk, homepage to the little-celebrated and little-known Statto-JTA Publishing Corporation, creators of such wonders as The Statto Dictionary, Surviving Bus Journeys for Fun, JTA’s Little Red Book Mk I, JTA’s Little Red Book Mk II, JTA’s Little Red Book Mk IV and JTA’s Little Red Book Omnibus (or more accurately, JTA’s Little Red Book Written on an Omnibus).

If you are foolhardy, psychotic, plagiaristically inclined or otherwise, please read the Statto-JTA Publishing Corporation Disclaimer before proceeding, or you may well find your bodily organs in a mangled pile in front of you.

If you do not fit into any of these categories, you are quite insane or you have read it before, please feel free to browse at will. If you have not read the disclaimer, we have no responsibility for that either.

If, like so many users of the Internet, you plan on publication replication, then it is advised that you read the Statto-JTA Publishing Corporation Copyright. This is a legally watertight reason not to even consider copying text or graphics from this site despite the one-click ultra-easy nature of this operation. We have ways of telling. And once we know, well, let’s just say we wouldn’t want you to have a nasty accident, now would we?

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